Movies - Top 10 Things Learned From Spider-Man 3

"Spiderman 3 is not just all fun and games, you know. Look a bit closer and Sam Raimi and co. are really making very acute social observations about life, love and sand.

WARNING! SPOILERS AHEAD!

1. EMOs are a product of alien symbiosis

2. If you find yourself running from the law, no problem! Just hop over the gate that says ‘DANGER! Particle Physics Experiment in progress’ and you’re in the clear.

3. If your girlfriend is hanging from the roof of a demolished skyscraper, never fear. Nonchalantly take some pictures and introduce yourself to her father, who also doesn’t seem to give a shit.

4. Flipping pancakes and listening to vintage dance songs will only lead to adultery.

5. Black is the new red. And alien goo is the new cotton.

6. If you ever find yourself battling a giant sand person and a jagged-toothed photographer alongside your best friend who just tried to kill you, be sure that you and him exchange ‘witty’ banter at every opportunity. “I’m a little busy over here, buddy.” “I’d love to help you, but I’ve got my hands full, buddy” and so on.

7. If you want to kill someone real bad, then go to church and pray and maybe, if you’re lucky, God will provide you with an alien suit made of pure evil.

8. Sufferers of amnesia just can’t help smiling ridiculously and eating ice-cream. Oh life is good when you can’t remember anything.

9. Bad boys eat cookies, drink milk and mimic their lecturers down the phone in a hilarious manner.

10. Is your girlfriend feeling down? No problem, make her feel better by passionately upside-down kissing some really hot chick in front of her."

Yes, more Spider-Man 3 hatred from me. You might be getting an idea of how much I disliked this movie after I dedicated several posts recently to it; but I can't help it, too many great articles people are writing that I feel the need to share them. If you're still unsure on how 'emo' he truly is in it, I recommend you search youtube for some great videos people made from certain moments in the movie. I won't dedicate an entire post to these videos, but I could easily pick out 6 or so that are just fucking great.

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